So last night i was reminded of how fallable i am in regards to the emotional attachment to food. I was at a small gathering celebrating a number of our birthdays which are coming up. pretty much all the food there was off my normal list of eating but i dabbled, including birthday cake. (HEY IT HAD MY NAME ON IT DAMMIT :) ). Later in the evening, i was talking with a friend who is also conscious of how they eat and had eaten like myself. I said, "Ive been so good! Now im going to pay for it!" UGH. Yeah, my stomach has been doing somersaults since then which given how i eat is to be expected. The other response is the more troubling. Ive been so good. How many of us have said that after a similar experience? And why? Why do we punish ourselves by emotionally attaching ourselves to what we eat?
Some reactions are good to be sure, the smells of holiday dinners reminding us of better times, a favorite recipe filling the house with that aroma. That is the positive side, but somewhere along the line a validation sinks in. We are good if we finish our veggies, bad if we cheat much. If we do good things we are rewarded with foods, that we are taught are ones to avoid. Where does this lead? It can lead to a overdose of "comfort food". See? assigning emotional comfort to food. The if the trend continues, as it did for myself, we can find ourselves unhealthy, seeking ways to unlearn what we have learned to regain health and (again for myself) sanity. And the extreme ends of it fall into eating disorders, shame spiraling, and its own brand of insanity. Place yourself in the mindset of a young person, bombarded with images of what "perfect bodies" look like, and then the next second hit with 10 commercials touting the most unhealthy but trendy crap a laboratory can put together.
But its amazing how it stays with you. Here I am, smarter than ive been ever about eating and exercising and still, I assign punishment to myself for eating a slice of cake. Frailty is thy name Fitmedic....
So where does it go? Where do we stop this? Is it possible to look at a plate of food and take the emotion away? can we look at it at its most basic, as a source of (hopefully) clean energy to allow us to live our lives as best we can ? Any change would probably start around the family dinner table. Not rewarding good grades with an extra dessert for instance. And by the way, if there isnt a family dinner table, maybe there should be? A chance to avoid Tv, cell phones, computers and other distractions and be as a family group, however its constructed at the time.
Id like to think that something i wrote could get people to think, about their own situations they face and how they deal with it. Maybe the next time you have a meal, whether its a normal day or a cheat day, acknowledge how tied in emotionally you are. DO you feel bad or good after eating? The ask why? The answers may be interesting......
All the best :)
Wednesday, October 23, 2013
Thursday, May 30, 2013
What, why, how?
Lets talk goals. Or why you set them and maybe why they don't succeed.
First the easy part. What do you want? Can be anything, in this case lets use me. I want to be better at Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. It's simple to want something but that's where it ends. Wanting wont get it done. Usually it means a prolonged serious effort, especially if what you want is meaningful.
Brings up the next question, what are you willing to do? This stops a lot of people dead in their tracks. For my goal I'm willing to train whenever it's possible whether I feel great or lousy, through minor injuries sacrificing social events , relationship time, sleep to achieve what I want. Chances are if you want something there is a variation of the above you will have to do. It's not easy but that's kind of the point. If it was easy, everyone including you would already have it. This separates a lot of people and their "goals" making them more fond wishes then reality.
It sounds like I'm being a hard ass and I'm not overly sorry. Anyone with goals has a mountain to climb in society today. Too much has been made way to easy to acquire and it deadens the drive to excel above mediocrity. And it hits me too. There are days I'd like to hang with my friends but I also know that I'll be better served on the mat. It's all about what myself and everyone else are willing to sacrifice.
So.... What do you want? Write it down at the top of a page. Now below it What are you willing to do? That's where the real work is............
Sunday, April 14, 2013
My debt to you
Had a brilliantly motivating day today. One of those that crystallizes what I'm trying to accomplish. I got to meet along with one of my dearest friends Ron Gardner, Roger Long. I've gotten to know Roger through Facebook and was excited to meet him in person. Both are dealing with Parkinson's disease and they are excelling. I can't do justice to their stories so look for the links at the bottom to get it from the source.
But I digress. To listen to them, going through the work that is their lives it makes you really humble. I've accomplished some in my life, but I know there is so much more to get done. And Roger was kind enough to remind me why I started FitMedic in the first place. It was and still is because I owe it to you. What I've done can be done by anyone, and that's what I'm here to do. Encourage you to accomplish what you want. And it may be similar to my story, it may be totally different. But we all have that story. And the success that I've had, well, not to share it is truly selfish. And yes for the cynics out there I am running a business and there is money involved. Ill never deny that I'd like to make this a successful entity. And if FitMedic is successful and people are reached and their goals are accomplished then everyone wins.
One last point that Roger made and I thought this was amazing was that he had met more people an established more friendships because of his condition than he ever would've. Well that's the thing. When people need help and extend themselves out there, very often it comes back in spades. So in that spirit I'm here extending myself to you. I'm not the be all end all of trainers and may never be but I've been through some of the same crap that you are dealing with. And you need to know you can get farther along the path with effort. Thanks Ron and Roger for refocusing and Inspiring me.
Roger Long: http://thelongwayup.org/
Ron Gardner: battlingparkinsons.com
But I digress. To listen to them, going through the work that is their lives it makes you really humble. I've accomplished some in my life, but I know there is so much more to get done. And Roger was kind enough to remind me why I started FitMedic in the first place. It was and still is because I owe it to you. What I've done can be done by anyone, and that's what I'm here to do. Encourage you to accomplish what you want. And it may be similar to my story, it may be totally different. But we all have that story. And the success that I've had, well, not to share it is truly selfish. And yes for the cynics out there I am running a business and there is money involved. Ill never deny that I'd like to make this a successful entity. And if FitMedic is successful and people are reached and their goals are accomplished then everyone wins.
One last point that Roger made and I thought this was amazing was that he had met more people an established more friendships because of his condition than he ever would've. Well that's the thing. When people need help and extend themselves out there, very often it comes back in spades. So in that spirit I'm here extending myself to you. I'm not the be all end all of trainers and may never be but I've been through some of the same crap that you are dealing with. And you need to know you can get farther along the path with effort. Thanks Ron and Roger for refocusing and Inspiring me.
Roger Long: http://thelongwayup.org/
Ron Gardner: battlingparkinsons.com
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
Doing What You Can When You Can
Constant learning is necessary for everything we do in life if we want to succeed. In the 4 years that I've been training in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, I have had the pleasure of training with amazing people, bringing abilities and personalities to the mat. What may be most impressive is how people deal with adversity in the form of injury. Now, when high intensity activity happens so do injuries, its just part of it. And at my school they stress that injury is not a reason to skip training. Its a matter of doing what you can and getting on the mat. So many of my training partners have come in bandaged up or with braces to train in what they really love doing. The latest is a friend of mine who has been a huge inspiration in how he carries himself on and off the mat. He is in his 50's and looks at least half that. So during training about 2 weeks ago he tore the biceps tendon in his right arm. He has the benefit of some top notch medical care and was able to get surgery done quickly with a prognosis of 6 months until full recovery. But there he was tonight with his right arm covered in a brace, strapping his Gi on and going out and working his ass off on the mat. Yep he couldnt do everything we were doing but almost. We all were inspired by what he was doing, but to him it was just getting on the mat and doing what he loves.
So where does that leave the people who dont train at my school? No different. We all have to deal with injuries at one time or another both physical and mental. Thats a given,\.But whether we go hide and heal and play it safe or get out there and do what we can starts to define who we are. The work you do is way more far reaching than the immediate discomfort. We spend every day carving out what our life is going to be. Inspire yourself and others. Today. NOW!
P.s. To all my training partners, pleas edont be offended if i didnt mention you specifically in this . You are all brave amazing people and its an honor to work and grow with you.
So where does that leave the people who dont train at my school? No different. We all have to deal with injuries at one time or another both physical and mental. Thats a given,\.But whether we go hide and heal and play it safe or get out there and do what we can starts to define who we are. The work you do is way more far reaching than the immediate discomfort. We spend every day carving out what our life is going to be. Inspire yourself and others. Today. NOW!
P.s. To all my training partners, pleas edont be offended if i didnt mention you specifically in this . You are all brave amazing people and its an honor to work and grow with you.
Sunday, July 1, 2012
Everyday Heroes
When you look at the best in any field one of the characteristics is the disdain of mediocrity. Constant improvement and learning characterize these men and women. But I put it to you that it shouldn't and in fact can't be something relegated to a small section of society. For an entirely too long of a period mediocrity and just "getting by" has been the mode of operation. And it germinates. When we expect less of ourselves we put out less to others. An then some hold others to higher expectations than they do themselves which is well, ridiculous.
Whether its at work or in our relationships, accepting mediocrity or just getting by doesn't increase our ability to be happy or make more money or get better as an Individual.
So can you go out and be Michael Jordan? Maybe not but your life can be a damn sight better than it was yesterday. Are you ready to take the plunge?
Whether its at work or in our relationships, accepting mediocrity or just getting by doesn't increase our ability to be happy or make more money or get better as an Individual.
So can you go out and be Michael Jordan? Maybe not but your life can be a damn sight better than it was yesterday. Are you ready to take the plunge?
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Slaying the Ego
Just finished an article about Zen and the Martial Arts. in Japan, the word Dojo has a duel meaning. One, a place for martial arts training, but also " the place for killing the ego." and it's true, the hours of training and the effort and the sometimes humbling experience of getting worked over helps keep the ego well in check if not very tiny.
So why can't it be like that everywhere. ? And for everyone? Doubtless you've seen people consciously making poor decisions because their ego won't let them admit a error. This rarely is confined to a single episode and usually leads to a string of poor decisions.
So as a little exercise, take a minute of two every day and examine a choice you are making. What is driving that choice, common sense or ego?
So why can't it be like that everywhere. ? And for everyone? Doubtless you've seen people consciously making poor decisions because their ego won't let them admit a error. This rarely is confined to a single episode and usually leads to a string of poor decisions.
So as a little exercise, take a minute of two every day and examine a choice you are making. What is driving that choice, common sense or ego?
Sunday, May 20, 2012
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